Big Confession

For those who thot i'm leading a happy life... I'm sorry that i lie abt that...

If u think i'm happy with a smile on my face, wel i'm not... deep inside i'm crying...
If u think i'm in love, wel i'm not again... never know the true feeling of it anymore..
If u think i'm occupied, wel i'm not... i'm still single as ever...
If you think i have forgotten abt the past, wel i'm not... I still live in the memories of the past...
If u think i got over my x, wel i've not... he still in my heart...
if u think i'm really moving on, wel i'm not... i simply couldnt get over everything...

I tried my very best to be calm... i tried to survive on my own without him... but simply i can't... every night i cry for him.. like a mad girl, i talk to his pics... everyday, without miss, i think of him.. his whereabout.. his condition.. his everything.. everyday, i dreamt of him... either happy or sad ending... i duuno y i got to bare all this pain of loving him... i love him too much... i fake everything just to let people know i'm alrite...

it kills me to lie to people... it kills me to fake my smile n laughter... it kills me having him gone just like that... i really miss him... i really do..